Honey, I’m Going on Strike – Chapter 35

Cassia mentally scolded herself dozens of times for her carelessness in leaving the letter out.

In her previous life, she hadn’t realized it, but now she had a vague sense of her husband’s personality.

It was obvious he’d be consumed with guilt after reading that letter.

As a commoner-turned-appointed noble, he seemed to believe that hereditary nobles were the “real” nobility, and his inferiority complex ran sky-high. He likely felt the same around her and her father, Count Ruberno.

Though there was no need to tread carefully, he was always on edge, watching her reactions. Once she noticed it, she saw it constantly, and it tugged at her heart. She had gently told him to work on it, but she figured it wouldn’t be easy. Judging by the expression he was wearing now, she had been right.

Cassia bit her lip, not knowing how to begin.

What could he be thinking? That it wasn’t enough to bring her to this poverty-stricken land, and now he’d even made her beg her father for money?

“…Sorry.”

“For what?”

“For marrying you into a poor territory… and now making you send this kind of letter to the Count. It’s all because I’m lacking.”

…Should I open a fortune-telling shop or something? Cassia shook her head firmly.

“You didn’t ask me to beg for money, so why are you apologizing?”

“No, no. It still doesn’t feel right.”

Zester’s hand slowly lowered onto the parchment. His slightly trembling fingers hovered there, as if debating whether to crumple it.

“I’ll set out for work starting tomorrow. There’s a request for reinforcements from a northern coastal territory. If I go there and complete the job, I should be able to stabilize our finances for about six months. But that place… I’d have to stay there for at least a month…”

Ah, he really didn’t want to go. The thought of leaving Cassia alone for such a long deployment brought tears to his eyes.

It wasn’t as if Zester hadn’t planned to earn money. Before Cassia came to Greze, he had been constantly deployed. He’d already taken two months off since their marriage. Considering the territory’s tight finances, he was long overdue to get back to work.

“You’re going now? You’ve got new soldiers, so of course you should stay and train them. I’m not saying you can’t leave, but for now, focus on stabilizing the new force. My father has plenty of means, he’ll help without giving it a second thought.”

“No. Sending that kind of letter to Count Ruberno… How worried do you think he’ll be? He must already be anxious about sending his daughter to a place like this. If I were him, I’d rush over, beat me senseless, and drag you back home. I can’t let that happen.”

“Pfft, you think my father would come all the way here? I doubt it.”

Cassia’s view of her father, Count Ruberno, was cool-headed. He wasn’t a bad father, but he wasn’t particularly good, either. He never valued his children more than the family’s wealth and prestige.

Maybe she had held such deep resentment toward her father in her previous life that she took it out on Zester. A man who had never once offered a kind word or warm embrace.

But looking at Zester now… he didn’t seem like someone who could treat his child coldly.

Was it just his aloof personality? In her previous life, she hadn’t even considered breaking through that wall…

Zester, still hugging his pillow, kept biting his lip, clearly bothered by the fact that she had to write to her father. Cassia let out a small sigh.

“We need the money right now. We have unexpectedly gained a new fighting force. They’re not officially hired soldiers on salary, so the burden’s less, but we’ll still need a significant amount to get everything prepared. Of course, by our standards it’s a large sum, but for my father, it won’t be a problem. So don’t worry.”

“I just don’t want to see you swallow your pride because of me. Let me be the one to earn it and take care of it.”

“It’s not because of you. Do I still seem like a Ruberno resident to you?”

“…What?”

“I understand. It has only been two months since I came here, so I understand if I still feel unfamiliar. But I’m now the madam of the Greze Castle and the wife of its lord. Greze isn’t just your territory anymore. It’s mine too. I’m doing this for my land. Why are you acting like I’m sacrificing myself for you?”

“…”

“I’m just trying to make this place we live in better. And this isn’t about pride. I don’t want to be stupidly stubborn and go around in circles for the sake of pride. Life has taught me that pride doesn’t feed you.”

She had learned that lesson all too painfully in her past life.

While managing the budget of a territory worse off than a poor rural village, how could she not have thought about writing to her family for help? But she had clung to that pride and endured.

Even if it meant skipping meals, she always made sure the servants got paid. Even if she couldn’t buy herself new clothes, she prioritized helping her struggling subjects. In times of famine and harsh winters, she lowered taxes and ate the same coarse barley bread as everyone else. Her life felt less like a noblewoman’s and more like the youngest daughter of a struggling peasant family.

She had grown up as the glamorous daughter of a count, how could she not think of her father? But her pride kept her from asking for help. She’d built up that impoverished territory all on her own. And now, thinking back… What was the point of it all? In the end, she died young of an inexplicable illness, after all that hardship.

To be clear, Count Ruberno wasn’t a great father, but he wasn’t cold-blooded enough to ignore his child’s suffering either. Back when she lived at home, he had doted on her, calling her his clever and lovely eldest daughter. She could at least send a humble request for help.

Why was I so stupid in my previous life?

Maybe it was because she wanted to prove something. Even if the Emperor forced her into marriage, her father had known the state of Greze and still sent her off without much resistance. She had resented him and wanted to show she could live proudly without him.

Looking back now, that life wasn’t proud, it was just miserably stubborn.

“Come here.”

Like Rael, who used to quietly sneak into her room during storms, Zester stood there with a pillow tucked under his arm and a sullen expression. Cassia pulled him gently toward the bed.

She took the pillow from his hands, placed it next to her own, and smiled. Zester stared blankly at her, then shyly climbed into bed. Cassia closed her eyes beside him.

“If one day, our daughter is struggling and comes to you, asking for help, what would you do?”

“…Huh?”

“You’re not going to say, ‘How pathetic, does she have no pride?’ Are you?”

“Of course not!”

“Goodness, my ears. See? I think my father probably feels the same way.”

“…”

“My father is a greedy man. I resented him at one point. But everyone values different things in life, and I understand that now. Still, he took good care of me while I lived in Ruberno and he never let me lack anything.”

“Of course. If I were a count and had a daughter like you, I’d want to do everything for her too.”

Zester muttered as he turned toward her. His face was slightly flushed. He must’ve realized how embarrassing that sounded.

“Thanks for saying that.”

“I was just stating the truth.”

Cassia lay back with a small smile.

“Mm.”

As the conversation paused, silence fell. Cassia stared up at the ceiling for a while before glancing at Zester.

She thought he might’ve fallen asleep, but no. His reddish-brown eyes were wide open, staring straight at her.

What is this atmosphere?

She had missed the chance to look away. Her eyes, still unaccustomed to this tension, flickered awkwardly under Zester’s steady gaze.

Then, Zester’s lips moved slowly. She thought he was about to speak but rather, it looked more like he was puckering them.

As if he wanted to kiss her.

No, not as if. It was exactly like that.

Cassia felt incredibly awkward with this sudden, tender moment. The only time she had shared a bed with Zester was under the influence of an aphrodisiac, and she could at least blame it on that. But now, they were both sober.

In ten years of marriage, they had shared intimate moments only a handful of times, and never with any kind of romantic mood or emotional connection.

But now… it was different.

She placed a hand over her fluttering heart and quietly closed her eyes.

Zester, whose own heart was beating ten times faster than hers, hesitantly leaned forward.

Touching Cassia’s hand, embracing her, or kissing her had always filled Zester with a strange sense of immorality. It was hard to describe, but it felt like a lowly man defiling a divine goddess. That storm of immorality always followed him, yet, it excited him too.

His lips, trembling, pressed softly against hers. Then, his tongue clumsily sought entry.

As it pushed past her stiff lips, that overwhelming guilt reached its peak, setting his whole body on fire.

His unrefined, almost primal movements devoured her mouth with hungry passion. The raw, messy kiss left both of them dizzy. A soft moan escaped Cassia’s throat.

Her breath quickened, and heat surged through her body. She clutched his collar, trembling. Zester responded by gripping her hand tightly, as if he never wanted to let go.

“Haa… Haa…”

As their lips finally parted, Zester shut his eyes tight. Cassia’s flushed, panting face had shaken his every last rational thought. No, maybe that reason had already sunk like a wrecked ship. He was barely holding himself back, determined not to do something he might regret.

Trying to calm her breathing, Cassia couldn’t bear to look at him. Her embarrassment boiled over, and she quickly turned away.

“Ahem. Mn.”

There had definitely been emotion in that kiss. She hadn’t had many to compare it to, but she was certain, it wasn’t just desire, but affection. Attraction. Maybe even love.

Cassia clutched her pounding chest, thinking:

‘These ten years I received anew… where exactly are they headed?’

She had promised to live this second chance as a lazy stooge, free of worries. But here she was, playing the diligent lady of the house, determined to save the territory.

And her distant relationship with her husband had taken a strange turn. Like passionate lovers experiencing their first romance…

Zester’s presence beside her made her acutely aware of everything. Not uncomfortably, but sweetly, achingly so. The fact that he was within arm’s reach…

When she first saw Zester, her seventeen-year-old heart had fluttered, but that had been a one-time thing.

Why was it happening now?

“W-Wife.”

“…Yes?”

Zester’s voice was cautious, making Cassia tense up too.

“Ca…can…”

“…Can?”

As their eyes met again, a fire reignited in her heart. A strange, tingling ache pulsed in her chest.

“…Can we do it…just one more time?”

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