“Cassia.”
“Yes?”
“After meeting the Count… what did you think? He’s… impressive, isn’t he?”
Zester’s face was still pressed against her chest, his expression hidden, but his intent was obvious.
If this were before, that question would have been nothing but an excuse to praise Bertol but now, it was different.
Cassia mulled over the words she knew Zester wanted to hear then answered softly.
“He’s not my type.”
“…Really?”
Zester lifted his head slightly, and the joy that bloomed across his face was so transparent it almost hurt.
She was worried, not knowing how this man could possibly survive among the shrewd, calculating lords of the North.
『He’s not my type.』
She had said it primarily because she was worried about Zester’s feelings, but it wasn’t a lie.
Bertol was already in her bad books, thanks to the bad memories from before her return in time. Even without his offensive remarks at dinner yesterday, Cassia would have found Bertol uncomfortable.
Back then, how suffocating had it been for the innocent Cassia in front of Bertol? There were several reasons, but the biggest was undoubtedly his proposal for her to become his mistress. At the time, Cassia was a young lady of the castle who had been married less than a year. It might have been different if Bertol were just an ordinary man, but his title was high, and he was someone Zester served like a superior, making him difficult to treat carelessly.
The Count family of Axios had been prominent in the North even before Bertol succeeded the title, and after Bertol took over, their influence expanded even further. By the time he first met Cassia, he was practically called the King of the North openly. Twenty-eight. It was a young age for the head of a high noble family, but to Cassia at the time, he was ten years her senior, and the fact that he was a soldier commanding a powerful army that had led many wars to victory felt somewhat intimidating. On top of that, even if she wanted to draw a line and act coldly, he was a close comrade-in-arms whom her husband, Zester, praised endlessly. Of course, that was only Zester’s thinking…
In any case, having memories of that time, Cassia found facing Bertol uncomfortable, and after hearing about Zester’s exploitation in the recent Imperial War, she disliked him even more. She wished she could avoid him entirely but with the looming territory war, she could not.
“When did the Count say he would be leaving? Did he not mention it?”
“Not particularly. It seems he intends to stay for a while.”
Before, Zester acted as if he was counting down the days until Bertol’s arrival, but now, for some reason, he had a pouting expression that clearly showed his displeasure.
Staring at Zester’s face, Cassia burst into a laugh.
Zester knew why she was laughing. After praising Bertol so much, his current self, caring about trivial things, getting jealous, and getting angry, must look ridiculous. But he couldn’t help it.
“Even if I become bothersome, please understand me.”
“What?”
Cassia frowned but Zester didn’t reply.
It seems he was worried what to do if she got tired of his obsession, but apparently, he had no intention of stopping, only asking for understanding.
Cassia’s thoughts suddenly drifted. Their marriage had changed. In their previous life, they’d had no conversations, no affection, no bond at all. But now? Zester, who was crazy about his wife, was one thing, but she, who found everything he did cute, was also a serious case.
Even this moment, his arms were tight around her, as if cradling something precious, while her own hand stroked his cheek. It was all unfamiliar. Where was the Cassia who, upon waking up in the winter of her seventeenth year, had spat venom at Zester? This man, who had won her over in just a few months, was amazing, and she, who had changed so easily despite hating him so much in her past life, was also truly amazing.
Cassia let out a deep sigh into the air.
“Why? What’s wrong?”
As he started walking toward the office again, Zester asked with worried eyes.
Judging by the way his Adam’s apple bob, he was nervous about Cassia’s reaction.
“Honey.”
“Hm?”
“Don’t like me too much.”
Zester, who had been walking diligently, stopped abruptly again.
『Don’t like me too much.』
It sounded absurd, but it was something Cassia had thought about for a long time before bringing it up.
Everything was good, even better than she could have dreamed. The husband who became affectionate after her return in time, and herself, who quite liked such a husband. However, unfortunately, the romance of this pitiful baron couple, which had started quite nicely, was like a tragic novel with a predetermined ending.
In the winter of her twenty-seventh year, Cassia was going to die. Despite knowing she was going to die, there was nothing she could do because she knew she would contract a disease that even the most famous doctor in the capital couldn’t identify. If she at least knew the cause of the disease, she would try to avoid it, but the famous doctor she spent the most money to bring in after coming to Greze said it wasn’t a disease caused by overwork. In other words, Baroness Greze was destined to be a tragic woman who, after a decade of toil, dies a dog’s death.
Dying itself, didn’t worry her but what concerned her was her changed relationship with Zester. Her ‘former’ husband, who would have just thought, ‘Ah, really? My wife died,’ and move on nonchalantly, was now acting like a person who couldn’t live without his wife. Even if it was just to lessen Zester’s shock after her death, Cassia was debating whether she should start pulling away so they wouldn’t become too close. Of course, she was failing completely.
“Why would you say that?”
Zester, who had been standing with a shocked face for a while, finally opened his mouth to ask.
“What I mean is, it would be nice to live happily together forever, but you never know when something might happen. What if I leave before you do? Mm… Wouldn’t it be too painful and hard to endure? If there was less affection between us…”
“What kind of nonsense is that?!”
Cassia knew better than anyone that it was nonsense. Getting along well and then suddenly telling him not to like her too much. And the reason being not knowing when they would part. But what could she do? She had thought hard about ‘ways to avoid death’ in her own way, but there was no clear method.
Raergo, the man she met in Ruberno, also said it. Reviving the dead is the realm of God. She was grateful to repeat her life again, but Cassia was one hundred percent sure that the ‘future of dying’ would repeat itself.
“You, you are thinking of leaving me after all.”
“I’m just saying it could happen.”
“What kind of talk is that. Unless you choose to leave, it won’t.”
“Something could happen regardless of my will.”
“There’s no way that will happen..”
Their conversation spiraled into absurdity. Cassia had to bite her lip to hold back laughter, unlike Zester, who was making a serious pitiful face. His reaction was just like Rael when he was being childish. Blood really doesn’t lie.
“I…”
Zester broke eye contact and started walking again, speaking in a rather scary tone.
“Do you think I’d just sit there like an idiot and watch you leave?”
Their gazes met in the air. His eyes seemed to burn with a blazing fire.
So this was what they meant, affection so deep it turned into obsession. In her previous life, she had never received such attention from her family, or from those who had shown a liking for her, or even her husband, so it felt unfamiliar to her.
But in this moment, watching the earnest affection, desire, and obsession flickering in Zester’s eyes, Cassia thought that perhaps she was the type who preferred being told she was loved enough to be obsessed over, rather than being treated with indifference.
‘If my husband had said “Fine, I’ll try not to like you,” I would’ve been so hurt. Why am I so childish?!’
At the same time, she felt a heavy emotion on her heart. When she imagined Zester being left behind alone, not knowing their separation was already predetermined, she felt pity for him.
“At the very least, that won’t happen. A situation where you leave my side against your will.”
With Zester’s firm, forceful reply, Cassia had nothing more to say. She simply blushed, tightened her arms around his neck, and shyly turned her gaze away in the opposite direction.
Zester carried her all the way to the office door in that embarrassing position and murmured quietly before entering.
“I will try. So you won’t be able to leave. I’ll cling to you even if I have to sell my soul.”
Ah, what scary words. Cassia was worried that when she died, he would make a huge fuss about bringing the dead back to life.
Zester entered the office, still carrying her in the same position.
Paul, who was sitting across the desk diligently scribbling on documents with a pen, looked surprised at Cassia’s unexpected visit.
“Madam?”
“Put me down, honey.”
“Wait.”
Walking with heavy steps, Zester sat Cassia safely on his chair opposite Paul and spoke.
“She sprained her ankle. She said she had something to say to you, so I brought her here. Talk, and when you’re done, call the doctor here to check her condition.”
“What? You sprained your ankle? Oh, my. Are you all right, Madam?”
At Zester’s words, Paul began to fuss over her, and Cassia pressed her fingers to her forehead and shook her head.
“No, no. Not a sprain. You know how sometimes you just step wrong while walking. I’ll be fine once I sit for a bit and stand up again. Honey, I’m fine, so go on.”
“What do you mean fine? Let’s call the doctor…”
“Honey.”
Paul seemed to recognize Zester’s obvious overprotectiveness and fussing, and he looked back and forth between the two with a mischievous yet pleased expression.
Embarrassed by that look, Cassia flushed and glared at Zester.
“Aren’t the mercenaries waiting? And Count Axios, too. Go on. I’ll see you at dinner.”
“…All right.”
Zester’s face turned pitiful and he stepped back a couple of steps as if reluctant to leave.
Instead of leaving immediately, he kept staring straight at Cassia’s face while backing away. When he reached the door, he let out a deep sigh and finally walked out.
Cassia stared blankly after him, then let out a helpless laugh.
“These days, I get confused about whether Master is even the same master I used to know.”
Paul, still wearing a pleased smile, spoke.
“I feel the same.”
Cassia agreed. In her second life, Zester was gentle, talked more than she had expected, and even showed a kind of cuteness in the way he whined. Aside from his face, he was entirely different from the former Zester, who had made her wonder what use he even had for a mouth.
Realizing she had unconsciously been staring at the office door Zester exited through, Cassia cleared her throat with a start, and glanced at Paul to see if he had noticed.
The perceptive butler gave a sly smile, having clearly caught on to the affectionate mood between the couple.
Flustered, Cassia hurried to bring up the real reason she had come.
“Ah, Paul. The reason I was urgently looking for you was…”
As she prepared to bring up Clara, her heart suddenly felt heavy.
“I heard Clara didn’t come to the castle. Didn’t something happen?”
The moment Cassia asked that question with a worry, Paul frowned as if displeased. Paul was someone who usually kept strict control over his expressions.
Seeing his complexion, Cassia was startled.
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